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How to Gain Control of Your Life Using Basic NLP Techniques

Knowledge of NLP can help you land that job, gain self-confidence, quit that habit, or close the deal. Here I will explain some basic techniques that are commonly used in NLP.

Most people can tell if a person is lying or is acting as though he or she is nervous. Simple signs to look for include tapping, fidgeting, biting their fingernails, biting the inside of their cheek, rocking their bodies, averted gaze, jumpy legs, heavy breathing, and sweating. Knowing how the body reacts in certain circumstances can be useful in situations in which you are deceiving. According to NLP Info, using body language to change a person's perception of reality is called anchoring. One can pretend to be in distress, confident, or calm simply by checking their body language. This is, of course, much more difficult than it may sound. The Special Air Service, Britain's elite forces, train their recruits in hostage situations in which they must remain calm and not give away any information. As seen demonstrated in episode two of SAS Survival Secrets, simple tricks used against the recruits include offering food, a cigarette, or water; utilizing multiple interrogators for a good cop/bad cop, bad cop/bad cop, and good woman/bad man tactics; asking trick questions or questions that could help the interrogator more than the he or she will show; or various forms of torture. Despite all of these circumstances, SAS recruits are expected not just to endure these formidable circumstances, but also to keep quiet and not allow their body language to give themselves away.

Body language is so important that it has become a necessary skill to master in NLP. For instance, a sheriff discussing the influx of criminal activity in the neighborhood might want to stand up straight, use tense body language, use lots of hand gestures, and speak in a slightly more severe tone. A counselor or psychologist might have to sit in a comfortable position, use fluid hand and facial motions, smile, and speak softly in order to get his or her point across. A salesperson might stand tall in a relaxed position, gaze into the consumer's eyes, use stiff hand gestures, lean forward, and talk in a way that would be empathetic to the customer in order to be persuasive.

This all sounds like common knowledge and yet most people do not use this knowledge in ways that can benefit them. If you are not a sales person or a psychologist, how can you use this information? NLP can be used to motivate yourself, break bad habits or addictions, and convince yourself of your ability to create your reality. The following are some simple tricks NLP counselors use on their customers.

One common way NLP counselors can change a person's behavior is through word association. Here is an example of a technique similar to the one used in the Youtube video Like me, Hate Them Persuasion, Hypnosis, NLP, Sales by Tom Vizzini: The counselor asks what makes the customer happy; then he or she directs the customer to describe how those activities or circumstances make him or her feel. The counselor will then recite those words frequently in conversation when the customer is describing how he or she feels during a negative situation. For instance, the counselor might say something like, "Describe how that instance made you feel." The customer responds, "I felt happy and at peace with myself and my surroundings". As the customer is describing their recent negative experiences, the counselor might cut in at times saying something along the lines of, "...and I take it that that did not make you feel happy or at ease in your surroundings". The counselor may want to bring up times when the customer did feel that way or may use body motions to bring their attention back to something pleasant or to alert them to what they are feeling so that they are not on auto-pilot. Simple body movements can reassert a person's perception.

Body motions are used often in these sessions. For instance Tom Vizzini often demonstrates in his Youtube tutorials how to reassert a person's perception using simple body movements. When a customer describes what he or she doesn't want, the counselor can use body motions to bring his or her attention back to something positive. Just like in the above mentioned video, to do this, the NLP counselor will ask the patient to recall negative things and step in one direction, make an obvious gesture, or use the left or right arm. Then the counselor must ask the customer to recall something pleasant, in which case the counselor will step in the opposite direction, make a different gesture, or use the opposite arm. When the counselor asks the patient to narrate their latest ordeal in detail, the counselor can bring his or her attention back on toward the things he or she wants instead of the negative things by a simple gesture because of association. Switching a person's focus from one emotion to the next is called reframing and is demonstrated in a video by NLPSalad called "NLP Reframing Technique".

One counselor used this tactic in a job interview in which he slowly moved three pieces of chocolate back and forward on the table as the interviewer was commenting on the things he wanted in an employee. He was amazed that the guy interviewing him did not notice these motions and took it a bit further. When reciting the things the interviewer wanted, he held the candy up to his face, "So you're saying you want this, this, and this?" Of course the interviewer responded enthusiastically, "Yes, yes, yes." As the counselor was leaving the interview, he put the candies back into his pocket when the interviewer had stopped him to give him a job offer. The counselor was so inspired by what happened that Tom Vizzini captured a retelling of his experience and posted it on Youtube. It is called "Getting a Job Without Even Mentioning Your Qualifications". Needless to say, I am curious about trying that one day.

The tiniest things can affect our behavior. When watching a news channel watch the tone, wording, facial motions, and hand motions of the news anchors when reading off the teleprompter or interviewing someone with opposing views. Their false concern over an issue isn't demonstrated by what they are reading, but in how they present the information. You may notice them speak over their guests, use hand motions to distract their viewers, ask trick questions, ignore what guess say and continue to lie despite being disproven, discredit by calling the guests names, cut them off, or even cut their microphone. Even the way sentences are structured can change the real meaning behind a story and mislead the audience. A video called "Interpreting Media NLP Neuro-Linguistic Programming" was posted on Youtube to best demonstrate how the media uses NLP. Most of this unfortunately goes unnoticed by the average viewer. The point of having such guests on a televised interview is not to hear their viewpoint, but to disprove it as ridiculous. Viewers do not leave with an unbiased, intelligent assessment of the issues but a predetermined idea that had been implanted using neuro-linguistic programming techniques.

Advertisers and politicians do this too through words, body motions, and images. Images are powerful tools to shaping opinions. Marketing analysts specialize in studying what images, sounds, and words impact a person's emotional needs. Terms like "love", "awesome", and "extreme" are frequently seen or demonstrated via the images and scenes in a commercial. Although subliminal messages can be illegal, there are many ways marketers and politicians can fool us. Short, repetitive catch-phrases have been used for decades in political campaigns, advertisements, and even in war time propaganda.

In conclusion, learning more about neuro-linguistic programming, propaganda, and hypnosis can help individuals realize the simple every day manipulation. Neuro-linguistic programming can also help people regain their ability to control their own lives. Such a powerful tool can be used for both good and bad. Manipulating others is never a good idea. When using NLP, please use it with good intentions.

Sources:
NLP Times, NLP Anchoring Explained, Youtube
NLP Salad, NLP Reframing Technique, Youtube
Tom Vizzini, Like Me, Hate Them Persuasion, Hypnosis, NLP, Sales, Youtube
Tom Vizzini, Get a Job Without Even Mentioning Your Qualifications, Youtube
Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Wikipedia
NLP Info, NLPInfo.com
SSpecialAAirSService, SAS Survival Secrets Episode 2, Youtube
911 Investigator, Interpreting Media NLP Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Youtube